Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Portrait of the Dieter as an Ancient Tortoise

It's not a plateau, it's just a very, very, very, very slight decline
by Scott Mowbray

Eleven pounds in 11 weeks: At this point, I have to accept the dreary fact that it’s going to take me six months to lose 25 pounds. That’s twice the time it would take my triumphant opponent, Sean Kelley, to do the same (though he is prone to spectacular fluctuations; he says he has roller-coastered as much as nine pounds in a week and seven pounds in a day. He must retain water, as John Turturro said to his wife in Quiz Show, like the Grand Coulee Dam).

I suppose the silver lining of tortoise-paced weight loss is habituation: Somewhere along the way, it ceased being a diet and became the way I eat now. Vegetable consumption: up. Meat: down. Desserts: few. Portions: smaller. Wine: we all have our weaknesses.
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